Fuh~

You know I always believe in karma and it since came into my life (this concept) was from watching the tv series Earl something something I couldn't really remember. Something bad happen to me and I always blame it on myself and I know when karma strikes. I may not have got an A for my Buddhist test but it doesn't mean that I don't appreciate and respect my belief. Karma has taken it's toll on me and I got no else to blame but myself in this. Last few days has been a blur to me like life just slap me in the face and take a "boohoo" on me. My life is definitely not going the way I have planned it. My mum is going through a very tough time and I wish to be there for her every moment of it because she means the world to me. I have to juggle things in life and without realising it, I'm slowly stepping into adulthood by taking in responsibility and bearing stress, pressure and worries that I have never encounter before. Mistakes that I made without realising comes with great consequences. Sometimes I have this flash back about how innocent and easy life has been being a lil girl all over again. The world hasn't seem so complicated then and life is made so simple that I think human are meant to live that way. Life is definitely not easy as I have learned it as day pass by. There is no short cut and when there's a huge block of iceberg blocking your only way to get off to the shore, you can't just surrender and die like Kate Winslet and Leonardo... You square up your shoulders and said, "You can do this, for better or for worse, have to deal with it!" and might add in a lil pat on the back for yourself. Pressure is no longer just a word or even a phase that I'm going through. It somehow is stuck with me and I think it will be my best friend for god-knows how long. My grinding of teeth has become worse and seeing a psychologist is my last resolution. Just want this roller coaster ride to end with no puking or disaster or watsoever because I know... It's just not easy. Hope it doesn't push me off the cliff since I'm already by the edge.

Ps: Small reminder for myself- Don't get influenced by people so easily and dumb enough to be back stabbed again for mistakes that shouldn't be done.

REGRETS

I'm sorry for posting such irresponsible post about my fyp. Sigh. If I can just control my temper once in awhile then I might see things clearly and not lobe-sided. Anyhow, what is done is done. I'm sorry. Especially to my supervisor for my FYP. I will work hard for it and leave the rest to fate. When I thought hardly anyone read my blog as I don't show it to anyone and stuff happens. Sigh.

OldSkool Moments XD

Lol this is something I found when I was going through my old pictures. It was taken when I was attending my last year of form 6.

I hate chemistry! And I never will ever ever ever like it! (that's me with my zero mark chemistry paper XD)

Well, Penang Free School have this "awesome" rule that every form six students have to attend the prom ESPECIALLY when you are in lower six when it is obvious this is specially dedicated to the seniors =.= but somehow me and my friends somehow manage to escape during our lower six and some us some buck!

During our senior year, they sorta have this weird tradition where each class will have to nominate a prom king and queen but the person can be from other classes too. The guys think it was a hilarious joke to nominate me so there I was standing on the stage like a scapegoat! LOL mind you, I was hideous as I did my make up myself and I have no idea how to do it! Before I even reached the hotel it had all melted from my face and I look like "如花" because my so-called "date" aka tumpang kereta driver didn't know where to park the car so we park elsewhere and WALK all the way there. I was all sweaty when I reached there lol!

Well this is Ru Hua a Taiwanese comedian. I swear my nose was that black when I reached there LOL!

Can u see the dark spot beside my nose? LOL without the flash is much clearer! I was practically a joke standing on the stage with all the hawt chics from the school! *flush*

But after that, a guy who I really really hate deep into every cell of mine told me that I look pretty lol ( I don't know he is criticizing or what but he sound sincere! XD) I start to enjoy my night =) I snap lotsa pictures with my girl friends and classmates.

we are all from convent school! 

Well as I was beginning to have fun, my friend came to tell me to get ready to go up stage. My first reaction was like "Wow did I win something?" and my friend was like " NO! You have to go up to answer questions! Compulsory for all the nominees." Then panic took over. I begin to frantically searching for my friends but they are nowhere to be found and before that I already told them how nervous and scared I was. But the other nominees were there to give each other support so I went up the stage and this is what happen...

As you can hear, I sound like a horse and the video is upside down because 1 of my schoolmates just took it down for fun. The question asked was " If there's 1 thing that can be changed about me what will that be and why" and the first thing that came to my mind was I wanna be skinny thin and humongous boobs but of course I did not say that lol! My answer was ridiculous! But I did have the feeling of being in a beauty pageant! *wootz* (perasan sikit is ok cause is my blog =p) Anyway it was a good experience although I did not won lol! Who would vote for me right *roll eyes* but 1 thing that make me feel sad and disappointed up to today is when I was standing on the stage as frighten as a rabbit, I look around for familiar faces to get some reassurance but I can't see any. Anyway I had fun and form six will have serve a good memory for me =) because there is where I met my Nimmy~ <3

My guardian angel... Mumsy~

This is my first blog ever and I dedicate this to the person who brought me into this world... My mum.
She is my role model to look up to when I'm facing problems in life.
She is the first one I call when I did badly after a tedious test.
She is the first one I call while crying when I'm down.
She teach me great lessons in life and how to be optimistic whenever I have a downfall.
She is the one telling me to lose weight and my very own fashion police... and to persuade me to wear push-up bras.
She is the one brought me into this world and showering me with countless love and affection without wanting for a payback.
She is the one that bring me go travel to so many countries without complaining about the expenses because she just love my companion.
She is the one that take all my slanted pictures and let me nag for the whole session yet still laughing.
She is the one work from 8am until 8pm, just to give me a comfortable living without having to complain about her fatigue and to dread about her work.
She is the one that make me can't stop shedding tears when I thought about losing her in future.
She is the one that make me angry due to her stubbornness and the anger wont last more than a few hours before we forgive each other and start talking again.
She is the one that will bring me to a KFC then order 3pieces of chicken saying she is full and just want to eat 1piece but ended up finishing 2 whole piece.
She is the soft-hearted one that will cry whenever she see some depressing news and always do charity whenever she can afford.
She is the one that will tell the hawker to wash his hands before preparing her favourite curry mee because he was touching his leg before that. Then go home and vomit out the food.
She is the one that will get drunk come home and start flipping the toilet switch asking me why the light cannot come on when the light is already on.
She is the one that will sms me to ask about my location: "W r u?" this way.
She is the one that always sneak some kisses and hugs from me when I'm sleeping then denies it when I confront her in the morning.
She is my sense of direction how to shape my road to the future and how to ease away a broken heart.



She is the one I hope I can still be her daughter in the next life... if it really exist...
I love you Mum and You are the best thing God have ever given me. I know we won't be together forever but I will cherish every moment I have with you and I will hold your hand and be your cane when you grow old. That's the only promise I will never break.

Mum, Me and Elmo in Japan.

Mumsy and Me in Guangzhou.

Mumsy and Me in Hong Kong.

Mumsy and Me in Switz.

Message to you Mumsy: Sorry about all the agonizing pain you have sacrifice to bring me into this world and I will make sure it is all worth it ;) *xoxo*